The Joys of Being Single
Updated: May 24
When I was growing up, I used to think that being paired up with someone was the be-all and end of life. I was conditioned by fairytales and chick flicks to think that love was easy, and that finding "Mr. Right" would be a doddle. Married by thirty, pop out a couple of sprogs, and everything would be peachy. Society made me feel as though I would be unworthy as a single woman, so there was this justified fear that being single meant I wasn't good enough. Then as social media took off, it became the epicenter for false happiness which meant my unhappy single self would often be envious of the cutesy couples that were appearing on my feed. "Those who workout out together, stay together". Bugger off I would say. But we're all guilty of putting our best moments online and I was no stranger to uploading photos when I was in my not-so-picture-perfect-relationships, as I tried to convince my followers (and maybe myself) that I was happy.
Luckily, the more rotations I've done around the sun, the wiser I've become and I finally realised that what I am seeing online can often be a load of bollox. So I learned to stop comparing myself to others and over time I began to find joy in being single. The goals I had set for myself as the younger Lulu, I can now confirm were spurred on by society's expectations. But being single is in fact, bloody great.
Six reasons why I think being single is awesome
1. I’ll start with the fact that you can sleep spread eagle in the bed and have deep sleeps without the other person’s thunderous snores disturbing your slumber. My bed is my favourite place to be and I love nothing more than waking up on a Saturday morning, having absolutely no plans other than chilling in bed with a cuppa tea and a few slices of toasted sourdough dripping with butter and laced with apricot jam….heavenly.
2. You get more time to be with yourself. Being on your own schedule is class. If you're bored, find a hobby, develop your skills, develop yourself - go to that workout class you've been meaning to join. Go read a bunch of books that you wouldn't normally have time for. It's important to switch off at times, so do what makes you happy. Being alone is my second favourite thing in the world to do. I’m very much a social butterfly and the nature of my job calls for me to be around people all day long, but come 5 pm, being alone in my pink and gold retro cave of wonders is the relaxation I crave. I don't feel obliged to meet anyone. I bake, I read, I watch documentaries and fall down YouTube rabbit holes ( and write amazing blogs-obvs!).
3. You don’t have to compromise. I cannot stress enough, just how bloody wonderful it is to have full autonomy. You can do whatever you want, go anywhere you like, meet whomever you god damn want to. Going on holiday alone is also the best thing you can do for yourself. A solo adventure not only takes you out of your comfort zone, it also gives you the chance to have other experiences that you might not get if you went with a partner. There's so much beauty in the freedom to travel solo. I love doing it, I'm forced to be more sociable, or if said opportunity doesn't arise, I spend time with just me, which thankfully, I really enjoy.
4. It's so much cheaper than being coupled up. Par example: You don't have to go to a bunch of engagement parties, weddings, honeymoon parties (yes, these are a thing now), or birthdays and have to fork out a load of money on people you don't know, don't care about, and maybe don't even like. Mmmmm, smell the freedom!! The freedom to spend that money on your fine self. Priceless.
5. Did you know, being single reduces the early onset of wrinkles due to the fact you have no one to argue with? I don't actually have any evidence to back up this statement but I'd like to think it has contributed to my youthful glow. My mind is as peaceful as a sleeping kitten on a velvet blanket, my face as smooth as a plum. Speaking of cats, I'm going to be a Cat Mom soon, and do you know who got to make that decision without consulting anyone? Moi.
6. A winter reason for staying single is to save money on razor blades. I just couldn't be arsed with the maintenance. Sure, who’s going to see them anyway? My sister, on the other hand, was horrified when I came home one Christmas with my Chewbacca chunks, and insisted I shave them. But quite frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn- an extra layer of heat never hurt nobody!
7. You get to work on your friendships and create new ones. These days, I way prefer to hang out with friends than go on dates with random dudes from online. My best friend and I would be a perfect couple if we were gay. Sadly, we are not so we've had to settle for being soul sisters. I also love making new friends and I feel that if I was in a relationship, I wouldn't have the time, lust, or chance to make other connections. The more people you know, the more opportunities can arise, so yet socialising tiger!
Sin é, as we say in Irish. These are my seven absolute golden reasons why I think it’s class being single. I could harp on a bit more, but I'll leave it here. If you want to read more from me I've gone and written a book about modern love and relationships (click pic to get to Amazon).